We are to resolve personal conflicts in the Church. We are not to point to others and blame them. See James 4:1-3. We are to look no further than ourselves.

1 – Always resolve everything (vs. 21-22)

This is not easy to do. Here are some reasons why you need to do it.

• God takes it seriously. Jesus speaks with the authority of God. There is more revelation in the New Testament and the bar has been set higher. It is no enough to just not kill people! In particular we are to get on with our “brother”. (Fellow believers). To hate your brother is to be a murderer. See 1 John 3:15. There are only three reasons for unresolved conflict.

1. “I need some time”. Take some time but don’t leave it too long.
2. “I’ve tried”. Try again.
3. “It’s not personal”.

• Nothing is more important. The supremacy of Jesus Christ in our lives is the most important thing in our lives. This wheel has many spokes. Conflict resolution is a spoke of this wheel. Don’t kick out one of the spokes. Resolve conflict now!

2 – It gets worse over time (23-25)

It is possible to be in a prison of bitterness and hate. Reconciliation can depend on your personality. There is a theory on the emotions that divides them into four types.

• Choleric – Decisive, driving and dominant person. They want to win.
• Sanguine – The fun person. They want peace.
• Phlegmatic – Steady, sensible, reliable. They want to avoid.
• Melancholic – Emotional. They want to be right.

God is calling us to reconciliation in our relationships before it gets worse over time.

3 – The price we pay for unresolved conflict

We pay a high price.

• It gives Satan a foothold. Do you want Satan to get some control over your life? See Ephesians 4:27.
• It leads to a root of bitterness. See Hebrews 12:14-15. It is hard to dig out a root. It can grow deep. We need to dig up the root and burn it. It can overtake your life.
• Tarnishes the Lord’s name. See Romans 2:24. God’s reputation for reconciliation is well known.
• It forfeits God’s forgiveness. See Matthew 6:12. God forgives those who forgive.
• It proves we are not truly converted. See Galatians 5. It is a work of the flesh if we will not be reconciled.

Categories: Matthew